October 31, 2007
First to start off with some very happy news! Congrats to Dom & Shannon, their new little angel arrived safe and sound on Sunday. Her name is Jordan Kate DeSantis and she is just as beautiful as her sisters. Jordan would have been Barbara’s 4th granddaughter; my wonderful, dear, friend Barbara would have been the best grandmother ever! (Or at least as good as I am)
The good news is that I am still kicking. As you will see in reading on, I am making a conscious effort to find things to be thankful for.
The burns from the hot water were gone by Tuesday morning, for that I do give praise to my Lord. With my diabetes as bad as it is, this could have caused great complications. I believe that God healed me from what could have been a serious situation. There are no scars to be found.
Besides feeling as though once again, I have been hit by a truck, nothing is standing out as being a severe injury from this fall. Again, I give all the praise to my Heavenly Father!
I will be honest with you, Sunday night and Monday I was just angry. Not at God, not at anything in particular, just angry. Pity party of sorts I suspect, miserable from the pain I was in and in a very grumpy mood.
I remembered the scripture I picked for last weeks update, 1 Thessalonians 5:18 (NKJV) Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, and in everything give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.
In everything give thanks, well that was certainly easier to write earlier in the day than it was to live that night and the next day. But then the verse continues on that this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you. So then, it’s Gods will for me to give thanks in everything????
If indeed it is Gods will for me to rejoice always and give thanks in everything then it would be up to me to make a conscious choice to do so because I sure didn’t feel like it. After spending time in prayer (again a choice) and spending time reading the Word of God (again a choice), I was once again able to give thanks to my Father in heaven for the many blessings and mercies that He pours out on me. I wasn’t thanking Him for falling (again) and feeling useless (again), but instead I started looking around for things that I could begin to rejoice in and be thankful for.
I want you to have a clear understanding of something before you read on. After receiving the phone call from my doctor Monday night I decided to begin choosing (making a conscious choice) to live by faith and not on the mere word heard, physical pain felt, or symptoms seen. 2 Corinthians 5:7 (NKJV) For we walk by faith, not by sight.
The phone call…
My general practitioner called me very late Monday night (10:00pm); our conversation was shocking to me. He is putting in a request for an in-home safety evaluation. What? What do you mean a safety evaluation? He said that he feels it may be time to install some safety bars and other features that would assist me in getting around the house. The angry, grumpy, pathetic feelings I thought I had put to rest rose up again in me, I firmly reminded him that I am only 44 years old. He then explained his concerns; he feels that I may get more seriously injured than I already have if this is not done and done soon.
Let’s take a step back for a moment shall we… I am still fighting for disability aren’t I? And I’m now having someone come in to possibly install safety rails in my home. If any of you understand this then please explain it to me. By the way, we are still waiting for a court date.
Anyway, back to the doctor… He continued, asking when I see my neurologist next; I responded mid December. He said that was too late, apparently I need to be seen right away. As of today, my neurologist will not able to see me until my appointment in mid-December. I’m not sure if things will change in regards to seeing someone, but for right now this is where things stand.
I mentioned earlier that I am making a conscious choice to live by faith. I could allow my mind to begin to imagine all kinds of crazy things and some of you (self diagnosing doctor’s out there) are probably drifting into some of those same directions.
No, I am not burying my head and pretending this isn’t happening and I will deal with whatever it is when a diagnosis and facts are laid before me. However, I believe it will take less energy (spiritually, physically, & mentally) to focus on the fact that God remains in control rather than trying to figure how “I” am going to fix things for God.
Wednesday I went to be fitted for and received a knee brace; it has already brought some relief in my knee.
Also on Wednesday, I had x-rays done on my neck; there is a small chance that either one or both of the plates in my neck were cracked in this most recent fall. This is mostly precautionary, but necessary. I have the x-rays here at home with me and in my professional opinion they look perfectly fine. However, I will let you know what my surgeon says after reviewing them.
And finally, I received authorization to begin physical therapy on my knee; hopefully this will begin next week.
I am having the hearing and ENG testing done on Friday, this is the test where I have had to stop taking my vertigo medication (I’m now starting to get very dizzy and sick to my stomach). This test is to show how my hearing, sight and brain are or are not working together. I’m not sure what will be involved but have been told to be prepared to be very sick by the time this testing is over with.
I’m sending this update out a bit early because I am already feeling the effects of being off my meds and know it will only get worse the closer it gets to Friday. I’m also not sure how long it will take me to be up and about again after the testing is done on Friday.
Please pray that this test will either rule out or allow for direction in treatment. Also pray that this test will aid in diagnosing why I am continuing to fall and drop things.
Continue to pray for the yard sale and for all those involved. I’m still planning on being there, so stop by; I would love to see you.
In addition, pray that God will continue to provide; the money the kids are giving me this week will go towards meds and co-pays. I am asking God to again provide for rent and insurance, stay tune and see what He does!
For those of you who have asked me to pray for specific needs please know that I am doing so; also for those of you how are sick, I continue to keep you before God in prayer.
Much love to all,
Diana
John 14:13-14 (NKJV) And whatever you ask in My name, that I will do, that the Father may be glorified in the Son. If you ask anything in My name, I will do it.
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