Tuesday, February 19, 2008

February 19, 2008 ~ Weekly Update #22

Let’s start out on a happy note, shall we…

Congratulations to my parents who just celebrated their 47th wedding anniversary this month.

Happy Birthday to my sister who turned one year older on Tuesday of this week!

Also, congratulations to Pastor Enoch and his wife Opin, who on Friday gave birth to their first child, a little girl. Welcome to the world ~ Joy Elizabeth!

Now for more expressions of sympathy, Pastor Enoch saw the passing of his aunt, this just after losing his father a few weeks ago.

As for my family, we also suffered a lost, Aunt Rose. If Aunt Rose had lived just another couple weeks she would have celebrated her 100th birthday. I do feel blessed though; I was able to attend her 99th birthday celebration where I saw her and Uncle Tony for the last time. If you remember we said goodbye to Uncle Tony just a couple weeks ago.

Onto the news that you have all been waiting for! Why the delay in getting this update out to you? I haven’t been feeling great… With the court date immediately following the complications of the colonoscopy (read more) I just haven’t snapped out of it yet. I’ve been very tired, suffering from migraines, and have been very dizzy. But here we go…

Great is Thy faithfulness!
Great is Thy faithfulness!
Morning by morning new mercies I see.
All I have needed Thy hand hath provided.
Great is Thy faithfulness, Lord, unto me!

A very dear friend of mine sent me these lyrics; for those of you who are unfamiliar with these words, they are lyrics to a wonderful old hymn. The words are just perfect (read more)!
(Lamentations 3:22, 2322 It is of the LORD's mercies that we are not consumed, because his compassions fail not.23 They are new every morning: great is thy faithfulness.)

The one thing that I want you to understand is that Tuesday, February 12th was nothing short of a miracle from beginning to end!

I know that many of you will try to chalk this up to the fact that I have waited long enough and that of course the judge ruled in my favor. What I want you to know is that this decision was made because I serve an awesome, living God. My Lord heard and answered the many prayers that went up for two years prior to this date.

Go back to the day before the court date, Monday, February 11th. Around 3:00pm I went to bed very sick, (I believe this was nothing more than stress) my only thoughts were how I was going to make it to the courthouse. I ended up spending most of Monday night and the early morning hours of Tuesday in the bathroom.

When I called Jeralynn Tuesday morning to see if she was ready to go she informed me that she too had started to not feel so good (again, most likely stress). God in His goodness allowed her to feel well enough to get me to the courthouse and back home again.

My friends Bobbi & Stan joined us for the trip. It was wonderful having them come with us; they were both very helpful, especially when it came to transferring everything that I brought in and out of the courthouse.

By the time it came to leave for court I had decided the only way I was going to make it was in diapers (yes, I said it, my secret is out), the vomit bucket, 2 ice packs, saltines, 7-up, and water. And for those of you who see me at church (or anywhere else for that matter) please don’t strain your eyes to see if I am sporting a diaper. If you really want to know then ask, but watch out – you might be sorry!

Anyway, we also brought MRI films showing the plates / screws in the front and the back of my neck, additional documentation from my doctors, wheelchair, walker, and anything else that we could think of that might aid me in getting around and helping in my fight for SSDI.

Upon arrival we were told that the drinks and ice packs would not be allowed in the building. The gentleman checking our bags looked right at all the drinks and ice packs and let us in without saying a word.

Just before going into the judges chambers the four of us gathered in prayer. What a wonderful time of coming together before our Lord asking that He be in charge of whatever the outcome would be. Because receiving a decision can take approximately 2 months, we were asking our Lord that He would allow this to be one of the very rare cases where a same day decision is granted.

We walked in and were seated; it was complete silence for what seemed to be forever while the judge reviewed both the new and old evidence. My lawyer, the occupational therapist, myself, and Jeralynn were all sworn in (Jeralynn was to give testimony to the fact that I now require assistance with most everything).

The judge started asking me questions, not my lawyer, just me. Had I known this was going to happen I know for a fact that I would have been overtaken by fear. He continued asking about my work history, and then referred to the occupational therapist who stated that my primary work history title would fall under executive assistant. (This was the first and last time we heard from her, remember her sole purpose in being there was to determine what work I was qualified to do).

So far we had been speaking for about 5 minutes, at this point the judge stopped and looked at me, he told me to relax that he was going to rule that I am disabled and would at least go back to November 2007.

My first thought was ‘Praise the Lord’, this is fantastic news, but I really need the payment to begin in March 2005.

He continued on, questioning only me, this seemed to go on for about 30 minutes. Again, I am grateful to my Lord that I didn’t know this was going to happen. He never again referred to the occupational therapist, never spoke to my lawyer or Jeralynn, he remained focused on me.

At the end of the 30 minutes or so he paused… and kept silent. He kept his head down while looking at the information that had been submitted and reviewing his notes. The room was silent!

Finally, after what seemed like forever he started talking, mostly in legal mumbo jumbo, but about halfway thru I understood what he was saying. He said that he would approve the disability payments back to March 15, 2005, the day that I lost my job. Immediately after saying this he paused and looked at me for a couple seconds, I think that he wanted to make sure that I understood what he was saying. Once the enormous smile crossed my face he had confirmation that I knew exactly what he was saying.

He continued on saying that he was processing my case as quickly as he could by making the decision at the bench. There would still be about a 2 – 6 month wait for any payment, but the decision had been made.

When we walked out of the judge’s chambers everyone was excited; I was just numb, all I could say was ‘wow’. I was just as excited as everyone else but none of this seemed real. Nothing was processing…

Please don’t get me wrong… I am praising God that the ruling came down in my favor. However, this hasn’t relieved my concern for the bills that are adding up and will continue to grow between now and the time the money is released.

Remember I have been without any income for the last two years. It has only been by God’s grace and the generosity of many of you that I still have a roof over my head. God has multiplied your generosity of financial gifts and loans, along with the many items you have given us for eBay and garage sales to provide for my every need.

I don’t want you to misinterpret what I am about to share with you as begging for money. I’m sharing this because I don’t know how the bills will get paid and I want for you all to see how God will continue to miraculously provide for me. My desire is that you will able to rejoice with me as you see God provide over the next few months.

As for right now I continue to have no income, so far in 2008 I have only paid about 20% of the rent I owe my landlord. God has truly softened this man’s heart toward me and for that I am eternally grateful. I’m not sure how long he will provide grace to me, but I remain thankful.

I still have disconnection notices sitting in front of me and a stack of prescriptions that I am going without. My health insurance is due again and the list continues.

Many of the bills are continuing to be paid by the money that Jen and Rick give me every month. However, the bills are being paid in the order of which one has produced the largest flame and requires immediate payment.

My lawyer is currently working toward getting a cash advance for me; this would come out of the settlement money. You would think this would be simple enough; however, there are many layers of red tape that need to be cut thru in order to get this check.

I have also been granted MediCare, but again, the layers of red tape must first be cut before receiving benefits (i.e. health insurance). Apparently this will also allow for me to receive the same benefits that ‘old’ people get (this is according to my health advisor).

At this time I cannot tell you where the money will come from to pay the bills that must be paid. The bills that have the luxury of waiting will simply continue to wait! I’m alternating my prescriptions with whatever I can get from the doctor and what I must purchase! Currently I am only taking about 50% of the med’s that I am on (a total of about 30 prescriptions).

What can I hold on to?

My God has brought me too far to let go of me now and I know that He will see me thru.
(Luke 12:6-7
6 “Are not five sparrows sold for two copper coins? And not one of them is forgotten before God.
7 But the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Do not fear therefore; you are of more value than many sparrows.)

I am finally at the end of this race, I can see the finish line and I am crawling toward it. The Word of God says that I am not to worry but to seek the Kingdom of God; that is what I am racing towards.
(Luke 12:22-31
22 Then He said to His disciples, “Therefore I say to you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat; or about the body, what you will put on.
23 Life is more than food, and the body is more than clothing.
24 Consider the ravens, for they neither sow nor reap, they have neither storehouse nor barn; and God feeds them. Of how much more value are you than the birds?
25 And which of you by worrying can add one cubit to his stature?
26 If you then are not able to do the least, why are you anxious for the rest?
27 Consider the lilies, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin; and yet I say to you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these.
28 If then God so clothes the grass, which today is in the field and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, how much more will He clothe you, O you of little faith? 29 “And do not seek what you should eat or what you should drink, nor have an anxious mind.
30 For all these things the nations of the world seek after, and your Father knows that you need these things.
31 But seek the kingdom of God, and all these things shall be added to you.)

All in all, I want you to know that I am singing praises to my Lord. God has allowed me to wake every morning with a song of praise on my lips and fall asleep at night giving praise to Him for what He has done and what He continues to do.

At the same time I am on my face seeking His will for my life. I continue to ask for discernment in each decision, and wisdom and direction for every penny that passes thru my hands.

Prayer Requests:
~ Funds will be released immediately
~ Wisdom for decisions that need to be made
~ Wisdom with every penny that passes thru my hands
~ A miraculous healing if God permits (the last few weeks I have felt as if my health has been deteriorating – there has been a definite change in my ability to function in the same manner as I had just a couple months ago)

Please know that I do love each and everyone of you! Thank you all for your very kind words thru phone calls, email, and cards. Thank you for the continued gifts of groceries that are dropped off on our porch, things that are donated to sell on eBay or thru garage sales, and the financial gifts that come in be it large or small.

Know that as God brings you to my mind, each and everyone of you are in my prayers!

Much love and many hugs,

Diana

Monday, February 18, 2008

Great Is Thy Faithfulness

Lamentations 3:22,23

22It is of the LORD's mercies that we are not consumed, because his compassions fail not.
23They are new every morning: great is thy faithfulness.

Listen to this wonderful song and here the history behind it. http://hymns.lifespringonline.com/?p=40

Great is Thy faithfulness, O God my Father;
There is no shadow of turning with Thee;
Thou changest not, Thy compassions, they fail not;
As Thou hast been, Thou forever will be.

Refrain

Great is Thy faithfulness!
Great is Thy faithfulness!
Morning by morning new mercies I see.
All I have needed Thy hand hath provided;
Great is Thy faithfulness, Lord, unto me!

Summer and winter and springtime and harvest,
Sun, moon and stars in their courses above
Join with all nature in manifold witness
To Thy great faithfulness, mercy and love.

Refrain

Pardon for sin and a peace that endureth
Thine own dear presence to cheer and to guide;
Strength for today and bright hope for tomorrow,
Blessings all mine, with ten thousand beside!

Refrain

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

February 12, 2008 ~ Weekly Update #21

And the decision is…

We won the case!

I give my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ all the praise, honor, and glory.

The details will follow in an update later this week. As for now, I am going to bed.

Thank you all for your prayers!

Much love,

Diana

February 9, 2008 ~ Weekly Update #20

Can’t anything be simple? This is what has run thru my mind the last few days…

My colonoscopy was to take place on Wednesday morning. I began my pity party as planned Tuesday afternoon (after I finished voting). Keep in mind that most all of you who sent emails reminded me that the worse part was the prep work, after that it was all smooth sailing.

Everything was in place and ready to go, but by Wednesday morning at 7:00am nothing had happened. Nothing that was except for the fact that I was had spent a good 5 – 8 hours suffering from chills, nausea, vomiting, and cramping. I called the doctors office and was informed that every once in awhile this happens. I was informed that I needed to drink another 2 liters (1/2 gallon) of ‘Drano’.

The procedure was rescheduled for 6:00am on Thursday morning, only this time we would go to the hospital as there was no opening at the surgery center. (God knew that the procedure needed to be moved to the hospital.) When arriving at the hospital I was still experiencing a few of the above mentioned symptoms, but they were mild in comparison to what they had been the night before.

Finally, I was asleep and everything moved along as scheduled, that is until I woke up in pain during the procedure, “Ouch”, I yelled. They gave me a little more twilight sleep medication and then again I shouted “Ouch”, after about the fourth time they called in an anesthesiologist. Finally, I was knocked out for good!

They had apparently run into a complication of sorts during the procedure. When I woke up I was told that had we not been in the hospital the entire procedure would have had to be rescheduled. It also ‘just so happened’ that the anesthesiologist was available right when he was needed, again, had he not been available this would have been rescheduled.

Upon getting ready to go home I was told that in addition to finding a couple other things (I will spare you the details), I have a hiatal hernia (located in one’s chest involving the stomach & esophagus). This most likely occurred during the time that I was experiencing severe asthmatic coughing episodes. My doctor believes that this may explain my difficulty in swallowing, chest pains, and heart burn / acid reflux.

Finally, it was time to go home; all I wanted to do was go to sleep! About three hours later I woke up vomiting, dizzy, and very sick. I called my friend Jeralynn (I’m beginning to think she is sorry that she ever offered to be my friend… lol)

Jeralynn who was out shopping with our Pastor’s wife called the doctor and was told that I was probably dehydrated and should bring me into the office. Off we went… after about 30 minutes and with three nurses who were trying to locate a vein, Jeralynn spoke up saying, “I’m going to pass out”. Jeralynn was scooped up and put into a chair, she started going from bad to worse, I’ve never seen anyone look ‘green’ before, but sure enough she was a brownish-green. I told her that she resembled one of Nicholas’ toys, an alien figure!

She was wheeled off to another room and all I keep thinking was that she was going to have another stroke. I kept telling them that I was certain that she was going to have a stroke. They told me that she was fine and that she kept asking if they had found a vein on me. On the way home Jeralynn joked (I think) saying that in my next weekly update I needed to post a ‘Help Wanted’ sign asking for a new friend. Anyone want the job?????

After what seemed like another hour and a couple more nurses I was finally hooked up to an IV. The vein was found shortly after they discussed sending me across the street to the hospital for an IV either in my foot or neck. Phew!

After a couple shots for nausea and about 5 hours later we were ready to go home.

Because Ricky was working that night and Jennie had school, Stephen and Jeralynn very graciously took Nicholas square dancing with them and I went straight to bed for the night. (Yes, after all this Jeralynn went square dancing!)

Friday morning we were up again and off to the doctor for a follow up visit. After being given another shot for nausea and a full blood panel workup we were finally on our way back home.

Jeralynn, I truly am grateful for your love and kindness; you continue to go above and beyond that which any (sane) person would do.

Stephen, thank you for allowing Jeralynn to remain ‘insane’; this way she will forget what we went thru yesterday and will continue to help me regardless of what I put her thru.

To all of you who know Jeralynn, please applaud her as she passes you by!

And now, please remember that Tuesday is the long awaited court date! My lawyer has stated that she now feels that there is a good chance that the judgment will come down in my favor. In addition, because this is considered a hardship case the possibility of receiving the decision on Tuesday is very possible. The good news is that the judge has not called in a doctor to testify as apparently he has already determined that I am disabled. It appears that the only obstacle will be with the occupational therapist that has been called to testify as to whether or not there are any jobs for which I am qualified.

Please pray that God’s will be done ~ remember that His ways are not always our ways and with that I am not going to assume anything.
(Isaiah 55:8,9
8 “For My thoughts are not your thoughts, nor are your ways My ways,” says the LORD.
9 “For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways, And My thoughts than your thoughts.)

I do however believe that He hears my every prayer.
(Psalm 116:1,2
1 I love the LORD, because he hath heard my voice and my supplications.
2 Because he hath inclined his ear unto me, therefore will I call upon him as long as I live.)

Please pray:
~ That all involved will be in attendance
~ For organization with last minute preparation that needs to be done for Tuesday
~ For the protection of my health that there will be no additional complications between now and the hearing
~ Wisdom for the judge
~ Wisdom for the occupational therapist
~ Testimony given will be honest; what needs to be said will be spoken and what doesn’t need to be said will be silenced
~ That a decision will be made on Tuesday
~ And finally, that finances will come thru immediately as we have only partially paid our January rent and have not yet begun to pay February rent

Thank you all for your thoughts and prayers! The next update will go out on Tuesday afternoon once we are home from court…

Hugs,

Diana
My Lord already knows what the outcome of this trial will be, I now need to have the faith that God is in control.
(Hebrews 11:1, 3
1 Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen.
3 By faith we understand that the worlds were prepared by the word of God, so that what is seen was not made out of things which are visible.)