May 31, 2008 ~ Weekly Update #32

A few things I forgot…

First a very Happy Birthday to PR… Pastor Ron! Happy Birthday to someone who means so much too so many!

He celebrated his birthday this past week; at least I hope it was a celebration :) I know once you start getting as old as he is you really need to decide whether to celebrate the fact that you can still move around or mourn how painful it is to do the same things you were able to do a year ago. (hehehe)

My apologies for failing to mention the following in a timelier manor…

In memoriam of the four additional families who have suffered a loss in the last couple months:

A young bride at our church (Rebecca) lost her mother after battling cancer; her mother did make it to Rebecca’s wedding and for that there is much to be thankful for. Please remember her in your prayers as her husband is due to be sent to Iraq in the next couple weeks.

Another friend at church (Kathy) said goodbye to her father after a lengthy illness.

My friend Stephen, (Jeralynn’s husband) lost his mother; this after suffering a stroke three years ago.

And most recently, my friend Mary who walked into her daughter’s bedroom, only to find that she had passed on.

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As for me it has been a long few weeks… I do believe that I had slipped into a bit of depression. My expectations over the last month were that I would feel 100% better, that hasn’t been my experience.

I have felt better… I’ve been able to get around much easier, much quicker, my thought process has continued to improve, I am able to hold my head up now for a couple hours at a time, and I’m only sleeping about 9 hours a day. I may not sleep 9 hours straight and it may not be during the hours in which I should be sleeping, but none the less it’s much better than the 12 – 15 hours I was sleeping every day.

The bit of depression that I was feeling was related to what my own expectations were versus reality. I was hoping that I would be able to get up in the morning, clean the house, work in the yard, go grocery shopping, play with Nicholas when he came home after school, and have dinner ready for the kids when they come home from work.

Reality has been that I can take a shower and make a meal every day… along with that I try to exercise a bit (go for a short walk), and do something small each day. Don’t get me wrong, I appreciate the improvement in which being on oxygen has given me. I was just expecting so much more.

After putting on paper how my life has improved over the last several weeks I now have a greater since of appreciation as to the small changes that have occurred.

I must say that after all these weeks I haven’t had any headaches, none that caused me to be bed ridden anyway. No headache that is until yesterday… the inside of my nostrils had been drying up from the constant use of oxygen so I took a bit of a break (about 24 hours). Just enough time to apply some cream and allow things to go back to normal. Well, wouldn’t you know it; I ended up with a headache that sent me straight to bed. It took about 12 hours of being back on oxygen, lying in a cold dark room with ice packs surrounding my head, and taking extra doses of migraine meds, but the headache finally went away.

I’m now certain that this added bit of oxygen has certainly helped my headaches ~ I am so very grateful for that!

There were no surprises at my doctor visit last week; it was just a quick visit in and out. I’ve been looking thru all the different secondary insurances that are offered. I thought that I had finally found one but it was going to cost me over $700 / month. My doctor told me to check out SCAN; I had forgotten to look into it, I believed it was only for those 65 yrs and older. I finally got around to calling yesterday and found out that I do indeed qualify. The great news is that it doesn’t sound like it will cost me a thing. I will be meeting with a representative from SCAN this coming week to find out the details.

I welcome any comments from those of you who are familiar with SCAN; be it positive or negative, I would love to hear what you have to say.

Regarding my income, I have found out that instead of the $650.00 per month that I am currently receiving from SSDI, I will instead be making a grand total of $1,300 per month. I’m still waiting to be reimbursed for a large amount of remaining back pay to which I am entitled (I need this to pay back money that I owe to individuals as well as bills that need to be paid). I hopefully will be seeing this money before the 1st of July.

I do hope that you all had a wonderful Mother’s Day! Mine was terrific, I was treated like a princess… the picture is what my Nicholas colored for me. I even made it to church, that was truly all that I wanted but everything about that day was wonderful.



We will finally be celebrating Nick’s birthday on June 14th. This will be the first birthday that he will have a “real” party to include his friends. With the last couple years being financially stretched so thin, Jennie really didn’t have the funds to have a party for him. Before that he was so little that it didn’t matter anyway.

He actually turned 5 on December 10th but with Thanksgiving just prior to his birthday and Christmas just a couple weeks after it’s an inconvenient time to throw a party. This year Jennie decided to start celebrating his birthday on the ½, well almost… May 10th is his actual half way mark, but that also happens to be the birthday of his auntie Mariah who herself just turned 5 years old this past May.



Just two days after his party on June 16th my precious little Nicholas will be graduating from pre-school. Nick missed starting kindergarten as his birth was just 5 days too late; this I think ended up being a blessing. He will now be entering kindergarten so much better prepared then he would have last year. I must say, he is a very smart, creative, and happy little boy; can you tell what a proud grandma I am? For those of you who knew me when Nick was born, can you believe how fast time goes by?

He loves riding his bike, skateboarding, riding his scooter, swimming, and climbing anything from ladders to trees to walls. He loves to figure out how things work… I think he gets some of that from watching his daddy and grandpa Cesar fixing things at both my house and grandpa’s house. If he’s left alone too long I will walk in on something that has been taken completely apart; he will tell me that it wasn’t working right and he needed to fix it.

Thank you to Children’s Hunger Fund as they gifted us with another wonderful delivery of delicious food. I am always amazed at the generosity of this wonderful organization. If you are ever looking to make a donation to a charitable organization who helps so many who are truly in need then please consider them. If you want to see what they are all about then take a moment and look at their site: http://www.childrenshungerfund.org/

Well that is enough for now, my plan (as it is every Saturday) is to try and rest so that I can make it to church tomorrow.

With love,
Diana

(Matthew 5:3-10
3 Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
4 Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted.
5 Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth.
6 Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be filled.
7 Blessed are the merciful, for they shall obtain mercy.
8 Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God.
9 Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God.
10 Blessed are those who are persecuted for righteousness’ sake, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.)

http://www.interviewwithgod.com/beatitudes/

May 8, 2008 ~ Weekly Update #31

This has been an interesting week for me… My driver’s license expired last month and it was time to make a decision. Was I going to renew my license with the hope of someday driving again or had the time come to get a California ID.

I had stopped driving a couple years ago because my neurologist determined the spinal cord injuries interfered with my ability to safely operate a motor vehicle. Any attempt in correcting this would require a third surgery on my neck. Because of my current health problems surgery is not possible at this time.

So the decision was made… I opted for a California ID card.

Experiencing this has certainly allowed me to have empathy for the elderly who have what may be their last bit of freedom taken away from them, their ability to drive. It’s a strange feeling to know that even if I wanted to jump in the car and take off that legally I can no longer do that. It’s all good though… after not driving for the past couple years I’m not sure that I would want to get behind the wheel again, especially here in Los Angeles.

Oxygen results… it seems to have lifted some of the brain fog that I have been in but no other improvements. I had a follow up visit on Monday and it was decided that I will now be on oxygen 24/7. Some additional tanks will be delivered this week so that anytime I leave the house I will still be able to breathe in this additional air. If I didn’t already need help getting around this should be quite interesting… I can see it now, sometimes I just need a cane, but usually I have a walker or wheelchair and now will be dragging along a tank of oxygen. This should certainly be interesting if not entertaining. Still, I am actually quite excited to see what the outcome of this may be. My hope is that I will regain some of the energy that I have lost and that I can start going to church again.

Some days are really depressing, the days I that I must decide whether to use my energy taking a shower or to fix something to eat. Then I think of my friend Vicky… she is first of all my hero and secondly a quadriplegic who has been experiencing some difficult days lately. In my feeble attempts I try to follow her example that regardless of what lies behind or ahead of her; she has made the choice to keep her focus on Christ and to never give up.

(II Corinthians 4:16-18
16 That is why we never give up. Though our bodies are dying, our spirits are being renewed every day.
17 For our present troubles are small and won’t last very long. Yet they produce for us a glory that vastly outweighs them and will last forever!
18 So we don’t look at the troubles we can see now; rather, we fix our gaze on things that cannot be seen. For the things we see now will soon be gone, but the things we cannot see will last forever.)

What became real to me is that when speaking with a friend I realized that regardless of our situations, as long as we are serving our Lord…

Now, I don’t want you to interpret serving my Lord as just saying that you believe there is a God or saying that yes, you believe that Jesus Christ died on the cross for your sins. Instead I want you to know that serving my Lord means that you must truly give your life to Christ and daily serve Him with all that you have.

So… as long as we are serving our Lord then regardless of what you go thru you will have a peace and a joy that you will find no where else.

If you are daily serving our Lord then you will seek guidance and wisdom from Him with every choice you make, every sound you mutter, and with every thing that you do. If this is how you are living your life then you will be living as God would have you live. You will experience a kind of joy that only God can give. You will have the reassurance that what happens on this earth is only for a moment and that what counts is where you will spend eternity.

When I die I know where I will get to spend eternity… my eternity will be spent worshiping and praising the King of King’s and Lord of Lord’s, my Savior, Jesus Christ. What a glorious reward that will be!

On another note…

Happy Mother’s Day to all you wonderful mothers! If nobody is going to celebrate you then celebrate yourself… you are worth it. Buy yourself a bouquet of flowers, take yourself out to eat, get a pedicure, or just put your feet up for the day.

To all you husbands of mothers, make sure you celebrate your wife. She did after all raise your children, she carried each of them for nine months, and went thru endless hours of labor (or a very painful c-section) to provide you with those wonderful humans we affectionately call our children.

To those whose mothers are still alive, make sure you tell your mother that you love her. Even though we as mothers don’t always act like it, we love you more than you will ever know. As for my children, you are my pride and joy! I can’t put into words how much I love and care for you. And my Nicholas, what can I say except that you were an answer to prayer and now you are a blessing!

And now to my mother…

Thank you for being my mom; thank you for the endless hours that you have spent in prayer for me, my children, and grandson. Thank you for knowing when to give me space and knowing when to come in and scoop me up. Even though you may not think so, you are the greatest mother there ever was and I thank God for the privilege of allowing me to be your daughter.

I love you mom!

With much love to all,

Diana

P.S. Just in case you are not aware… the price of First Class postage is going up on May 12, 2008. I wanted to remind you all that the Post Office offers ‘Forever Stamps’. You may purchase as many of these stamps as you like at the current rate of .41 cents. These stamps will always be valid as First-Class postage on standard envelopes weighing one ounce or less, regardless of any subsequent increases in the First-Class rate. To purchase these stamps at the current rate of .41 cents each you must purchase them before May 12, 2008.